whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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