you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
