Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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