Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
He uses pillows to masturbate.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize