just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
