And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
