K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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