A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
