the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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