She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
