God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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