I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
tell me about the fingering
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