Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
