sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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