she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize