there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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