Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
