I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize
