Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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