so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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