Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
nutella sex= disaster
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
