garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
a search helicopter?!
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize