Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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