Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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