After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
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STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
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Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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