I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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