Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
