Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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