piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
The best revenge is premature balding
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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