Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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