I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Never underestimate the power of titties
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