my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
you will always have a special place in my vag
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize