It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
