Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
