What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize