So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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