You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
