Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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