Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize