Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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