I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
