i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
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he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
How does it feel to date your dad?
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