Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
