I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.