handjob tips. give me some.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?