Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
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