My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
