Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
