She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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