Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even my farts smell like vagina
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
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