you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize